Frederich Buechner on Forgiveness

One of my all time favorite quotes by preacher/author Frederich Buechner.  A nice summary of many of the things we've been talking about in our current sermon series on Forgiveness.

“To forgive somebody is to say one way or another, ‘You have done something unspeakable, and by all rights I should call it quits between us. Both my pride and my principles demand no less. However, although I make no guarantees that I will be able to forget what you’ve done, and though we may both carry the scars for life, I refuse to let it stand between us. I still want you for my friend.’

“To accept forgiveness means to admit that you’ve done something unspeakable that needs to be forgiven, and thus both parties must swallow the same thing: their pride.

“This seems to explain what Jesus means when he says to God, “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Jesus is not saying that God’s forgiveness is conditional upon our forgiving others. In the first place, forgiveness that’s conditional isn’t really forgiveness at all, just fair warning; and in the second place, our unforgivingness is among those things about us that we need to have God forgive us most. What Jesus apparently is saying is that the pride that keeps us from forgiving is the same pride that keeps us from accepting forgiveness, and will God please help us do something about it.

“When somebody you’ve wronged forgives you, you’re spared the dull and self-diminishing throb of a guilty conscience.

“When you forgive somebody who has wronged you, you’re spared the dismal corrosion of bitterness and wounded pride.

“For both parties, forgiveness means the freedom again to be at peace inside their own skins and to be glad in each other’s presence."

Ridiculous New Year Resolution

     I've decided to start spelling my name in new ways.
     It looks like Tiom is very possible.
     Time is also very probable.
     I'm very tempted to just go with lower case t.  It says it all.
     I have a signature that automatically attaches itself to the end of every email, but for whatever reason I always have the inclination to type out my first name.  As if to say, "Hey you, this is me, Tim".  The problem is that by the time I do that I'm essentially done communicating.  I'm not paying close attention and I'm not a great typist anyway.  So I end up sending things out under Tiom, Time, and occasionally just t.  I like the lower case t.  It's a cross.  It's modest (no big capital).  It's a nickname I get called by my wife, Sue's family on occasion.
    Mostly, I'm relatively busy.  When you get my email it says it comes from Tim and then describes the congregation I serve with the rest of the address.  And then you start reading it and it becomes clear who I am.  How important is it to get my own name 'right'?
     I like to think that I'm a genuinely self-effacing person.  Pastor yes, Reverend no.  One of the Pastors at St. Andrew yes, Senior or Lead Pastor most of the time no.  At the same time it matters that  am a pastor or that I might be your pastor or that the church of Jesus has seen fit to ordain me or that the bishop has seen fit to appoint me to this congregation or that we have another pastor on staff who is a wonder to behold but for a variety of reasons follows my lead or at least it is clear that if there is a buck and it stops on his desk he is perfectly free to walk next door and put it on my desk.  Those things matter and pretending they don't is a bit silly.
    But I still think I'm going to change the spelling of my email sign off anyway.  Mostly because I think it's kind of fun and maybe in a perverse way, funny.  We'll pretend that it isn't necessarily a sign of sloppiness or carelessness on my part.  I like to think of it as spicing the mundane up just a bit.  Who knows who will be writing back when you email Tim?  Could be Tom, Tin, or Time, or Tiom or even Tione.  Or it could just be good old 't.'  Let's just say it's an email wink--a chance for randomness and poor typing to conspire in order to chuckle a little "we both know who we're talking about, right?"
     Just think of it this way, when you click 'reply' it will come back to me either way.  Now some folks would feel compelled to add here about whether or not I will actually read what's in that reply.  I choose not to be so cynical.  Though I would suggest that if you really want to get my attention put 'Pastor Appreciation Gift' or 'iPad Air 2' in the subject line.  That gets me every time.